The Genesee Reflection #11

Tormented, anxious, guilt-ridden, restless, hurried, and impatient.  These are some of the words that could have described my state of mind over the past couple of years.  I would guess that I have hidden these feelings pretty well (or maybe not).  It appears that I haven't quite hid them from God.  In fact, I've never seen a list of them all together until just now as I was reading from August 19th, 1974 from Henri Noewin's "The Genesee Diary".  He writes:

"Today I had the strong feeling that things are basically quite simple.  If I could love God with all my heart, all my soul, and all my mind, I would feel a great inner freedom, great enough to embrace all that exists, great enough also to prevent little events from making me lose heart...When my heart is undivided, my mind only concerned about God, my soul full of his love, everything comes together into one perspective and nothing remains excluded...For the first time I sensed a real single-mindedness; my mind seemed to expand and to be able to receive endlessly more than when I feel divided and confused.  When all attention is on him who is my Creator, my Redeemer, and my Sanctifier, I can see all human life-joyful as well as painful-and all of creation united in his love.  Then I even wonder why I was so tormented and anxious, so guilt-ridden and restless, so hurried and impatient.  All these pains seemed false pains, resulting from not seeing, not hearing, and not understanding."

Divided and confused...these are typically the feelings that I have that precede the above list.  There are days when these 8 little words can hold me in bondage.  The truth is that the freedom from these chains is quite simple.  If I could love God will all my heart, all my soul, and all my mind, I would feel a great inner freedom...If I could become single-minded with my Creator, my Redeemer, and my Sanctifier...

““He himself bore our(My) sins” in his body on the cross, so that we(I) might die to sins and live for righteousness; “by his wounds you(I) have been healed.”” 1 Peter 2:24 NIV

I pray that God would help me to see, hear, and understand...